Counseling should be offered at every phase of life – education, career, dating, marriage, mental health, and others. Since more and more marriages are falling out these days, marriage counseling sessions are on the rise. However, before counseling, you should know what you are getting yourself into and what you will get out of it.
What is Marriage Counseling?
Counseling is a form of therapy in which people are offered professional advice as per the need of their situation. In marriage, it could be two people who are planning to get married, are married but facing irreconcilable differences or are under the trial period for divorce. Marriage counseling works toward resolving conflicts.
When & Why is Marriage Counseling Needed?
Couples should go for marriage counseling when the rate of fights increases, fights get out of hand, and instead of making up, they end up fighting even more. This is when, rather than sweeping every issue under the rug, talking and communication under the guidance of an expert is required. If the love is still there and two people are willing to work out their differences, marriage counseling will undoubtedly help. It is especially needed if children are involved because such incidents in childhood shape the future.
How Does Marriage Counseling Help?
Everyone knows marriage counseling exists. Despite this, not every couple actively seeks it. Why is that? Because most are not aware of how marriage counseling may improve couples’ relationships.
Let us look at seven ways marriage counseling may improve couples’ relationships.
1. Understanding the Difference between No-Communication & Miscommunication
Most couples either don’t communicate at all or miscommunicate all the time. A marriage counselor helps them see the cons and benefits of honest communication. A counselor asks the right questions that the spouse might have ignored otherwise. Usually, partners fail to see sense when overwhelmed with too many emotions. During the heat of the moment, they could take a jibe at each other’s weaknesses which weren’t their intention. This results in more fights, hurt, and pain. Marriage counseling offers a safe space for these two people to be vulnerable and, thus, communicate because they would not be able to walk out from each other.
2. Putting Each Other in their Partner’s Place
A marriage counselor helps partners see each other’s standpoints in the face of a specific circumstance. Before two people are a couple, they are two different individuals. Losing oneself entirely in a relationship at the cost of their individuality shouldn’t be normalized. Every person’s response to a situation differs from the other. At the same time, it could be similar as well. Understanding this can help two people accept each other better.
3. A Third Person’s Point of View
Generally, a couple doesn’t like too much interference or unwanted advice from other people, be it family, relatives, or strangers. But sometimes, a third-person perspective can help see what went wrong when two people were in a tight spot. Marriage counseling exists for this sole purpose. The counselor can offer better solutions because it is their area of expertise. Also, it is more beneficial to seek professional help than hear the biased opinions of others.
4. Unlearning Co-Dependency
An individual should be one’s person before they are someone’s partner. They shouldn’t project their fears, insecurities, and needs on the other person. They should have their world, and their life shouldn’t revolve around their partner. As fun as it is for a couple to go grocery shopping together, if the situation demands it, they should be able to do the same alone. Co-dependency is one of the most common reasons a marriage falls apart.
5. Importance of Personal Space
Marriage may be two people deciding to be together till ‘death do them part. But spending every waking moment with each other isn’t physically possible. Respecting the personal space of one’s partner is the essential lesson offered in marriage counseling.
6. Equal Division of Chores
It is the prettiest thing that leads to fights between couples. One forgot to pay the bills on time. The other didn’t check if the fridge was empty, etc. Equality is needed in marriage as well. The woman shouldn’t be expected to manage the household while the man shouldn’t be expected the only one contributing financially. Counseling can help to implement and execute this in everyday life.
7. Respecting Each Other’s Work
Working couples have a hard time managing their married and work life. A marriage counselor can offer guidance as to how to make time for each other and in the process, respect each other’s work as well.